Seriously Crazy
by Prime Revolver
Summary: G1: A trip to the mall, plotting, gigantic boxes, teasing a poor little mini-bot or is should that me plural? Mistletoe, and. . .is that a pistol! Dear Primus, help us all.
1. Chapter 1

Prologue

----

Room basically dark except for the small little light that illuminated off of several devices in his room, like his impossibly large and Cybertronian upgraded stereo system that sat particularly on the floor and on a desk. But it wasn't quiet, just slightly. The stereo was still on playing a random song from a local radio station it had been set on previously. About that time the lead saboteur's chronometer silently went off waking up sleeping Porsche.

Jazz groaned and turned over on his back letting his doorwings get some relief from where Jazz had been lying on his side. The one he'd been lying on get stiff. Activating a switch inside of himself to turn it off and went limb again then suddenly stretched on his recharge berth and yawned like a cat just waking up from a nap; he hadn't slept that good in a long time. Flinging his feet around so they'd land on the floor, sat up, and yawned once again, long and loud. He did have to start another day's work.

Getting up, unsteadily at first, walked over to the door feeling as if he was still half in recharge. The little party they had last night in the lounge was coming back to haunt him with vengeance. Figures. Just as he was about to exit his quarters he stopped abruptly catching a glimpse of something on the floor, one leg still mid-air. How could you miss _bright_ pink paper? Wait back up . . . pink?! Lying on the floor neatly folded parcically under the door was a large -in human standard and maybe even in Transformer standers- piece of paper laying at his feet.

Jazz cocked his head back for a second then looking down both ends of the hallway, suspicious. When random objects were well random around the _Ark _it was naturally instinct to be suspicious. Curiosity getting the better of him, as usual, Jazz knelt down to pick it up and see what it was, holding it like he was suspecting it to blow up in his face . . . but then again around here it was a high possibility, especially with unnamed vigilantes that currently lived here. Unfolding it carefully and seeing it hadn't covered him with foul Jazz started reading it.

_Jazz, What would you like for a gift to get as a present? List some stuff please. Now think of something logical for me to get ya. Rachel_

Seating just under the resident silver haired young women was her trademark psychopathic looking flower, fangs and all.

Re-reading it once or twice to make sure he understood it right. Well yes he understood what the message meant but the problem was he didn't _understand_ the occasion for it. What he'd do to deserve a gift anyway? It wasn't a bad thing by no means, but it really made no sense.

"Wait!" the Porsche blurted out seeming at random then he started mumbling to himself not realizing he was doing it "Didn't Spike . . . or was 't Blair who mention somethin' 'bout a human holiday comin' up?" rubbing the back of his neck as he thought out loud

Still pondering on what had just come to his processors attention Jazz reached back without looking and pushed a button beside his door on the control panel to let it close. It slide close silently and he walked outside to his routine shift, today with Ironhide. Completely oblivious to the other happenings in the _Ark_ at almost the same time the other 'bots who were also waking up to find the weird message in the letters from none other than . . . Rachel. Was that really a surprise?

Very few of them actually understood the message and the occasion.

---

A/N:

Isn't that so much better? Way longer, hopefully void of errors (which I'm bad for)

Transformers and all related char(s) belong to HasTak and associated companies

Except Blair, Rachel, and the plot, which are mine


	2. Chapter 2

---

Many, which included almost all, of the _Ark_ 'bot's had by now assembled in the conference room, courteous of a well convinced Teletran, to figure out what had gotten into the young women's head this time. When it came to Rachel there was no telling. They all knew all to well of her mischievous side. No wonder why she hangs out with the twins. If the twins alone weren't bad enough the Autobot crew were graced with Rachel's almost content presence at the _Ark._ But you didn't here the twins complaining when it came to their pranks; Rachel was brilliant even if her pranks took a while to 'set in' as Jazz had put it one evening.

That had been said after one said incidences where Prowl _and_ Ironhide had been turned into 'all the colors of the rainbow' quote Rachel and Sidswipe. How that feet had been pulled off was still unknown, even to Prowl himself.

"So Rachel" Began an obviously _un_pleased Cliffjumper, arms crossed over his chest, frown on his faceplate. Tightly between two of his black finger was a fluorescent; headache producing giant orange piece of paper. "You mind explaining all these" holding up the said paper "letters that we all received _just_ over night", the deep red mini-bot was using that tone of his again 'smart' in that irritating way of his

Said mastermind was seating between her partners in crime on either side of her. She had that smug grin on her face like she'd just pulled off the best prank _ever_; her bright green eyes just glowed. Taking her hands out from her pockets she didn't let her odd smile despite not liking the red mini-bot (she must have picked that up from the twins as well). She was getting ready to start, the ones who knew what the letter meant just sat back to wait and see what would happen this time.

Rachel, Spike, and Blair were the center of attention to Blair's dismay the later of the two had been on in Rachel's mystify making some were along the line, which translated before the roosters got up in the morning. Blair who didn't look to please one bit about it all, she was seating in front of Jazz closer to the front of the long black table. Spike was naturally not to far from Bumblebee. The youngest of the three, he still didn't know what to think about all this.

Rachel turned to the Inca gold hacker who was seating at his normal seat that was slightly off toward the corner closes to Optimus Prime "Hey Teletran" getting the hackers attention "can you give me the complete definition of Christmas if you'll be so kind?"

'Tran, who didn't seem to look like the only one who didn't seem all to interested in the young women's mystify making or planes, which ever they were, looked up no moving his head from his fist on the chair arm.

He answered absently _"Christmas; a holiday on December the 25th celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ -_The next part I was told to add- a_lso the time of year when people, particularly friends and family, get together and exchange gifts with the people they care or love or both_

"Thank you," 'Tran just nodded

"Hold up, back up." Interrupted waving his hands "What does this _human_ holiday have to do with us? Were not from Earth if you've failed to notice." Exclaimed Brawn from some were in the mass of 'bot who were forced to stand up

"Yeah that's true" her she shrugged "but while your here -stuck if I might add- declared by yours truly" putting her hand on her chest and grinning "_Christmas_ is an Autobot holiday! Unfortunately for me it's optional for you to celebrate so declared the most thanked Optimus Prime. But your still getting a presence" she explained suddenly getting really serious while not being at the same time

"No its just an excuse for you to go shopping" added Spike raising a brow at the older women

Rachel turned her attention sharply over at the boy who was seating in front of the yellow bug and glared at Spike, but he didn't get the message or just didn't care and made a face at her. While she was preoccupied with Spike distraction Prowl frowned as he looked over at the Autobot leader with that looked when he was scolding the twins.

Sending his superior a text _:: What are you doing encouraging her?::_

Optimus chuckled inwardly _::I didn't seem what harm could come from it. I told her she could do this as long as it didn't end anyone on the brig or to you.::_

_::How kind of you _sir Prowl frowned

"Now were was I before I was so _roundly_ interrupted?" looking at a certain person in the room

"I still don't get it Rachel," commented Sideswipe leaning forward and crossing his arms on the table for once he had that serious look on his face as if he had really contemplated on all this. He'd been one of the few 'bot who knew but at the same time didn't get it.

Standing up and facing the red warrior but addressing all the 'bots "Look you don't _have_ to get it, just go along with the flow alright."

Here's were Blair finally spook up "When it comes to Christmas" she started "Rachel is what we call a Christmas-_holic _but as Spike said she's more in it for the shopping luckily not just for herself."

Rachel started mumbling on to her self about her sister and Spike luckily Wheeljack started up before Rachel made her words heard. "So can you explain a little more of this to use Rachel? Like what do we do? You mentioned something about gifts and decorating." asked Wheeljack with a raised optic ridge

As soon as the Lancia had read the message on his bright green paper he'd gone straight into looking what it was up. He understood but wanted to here the humans explanation. Just like always it captivated the engineer. Human customs, he found, were doing that to him a lot but he didn't mine. As a 'bot who loved finding out about new thins his 'Christmas' thing wasn't an exception. He'd spoken briefly to Blair in the hall about the holiday and to get more information out of her, she was resourceful. Unfortunately he couldn't get much out of her, she said she'd explain more later when the time came.

"Alright if you've been hiding under a rock the past few days you've had to noticed that houses, shops, streets, -so forth so on- have suddenly been sprouting mulit colored items." Here Blair turned the hacker "'Tran can you give me a picture?" she asked

Giving a nod the gold 'bot sat up and turned around to the consoles that lined most of the back wall and started pressing in commands. Within a few seconds the room went dark as Teletran personally installed holo-projector in the cent of the long table opened up and on-lined. The beyond detailed hologram was of a nice two story middle class house that glowed with said multi colored lights and other Christmas items.

_"Does he have a hologram for every occasion or what?" whispered_ Sideswipe to his brother. Sunstreaker just shrugged.

"Yes! Like that." pointing out Rachel getting excited again.

Rachel put her hand behind her head a worried look on her face as the lights slowly came back on and the twins along with her sister noticed "The problem is how are we going to get let-along find- a Transformer sized Christmas tree or ornaments for that mater?"

Bluestreak cocked his head sideways "A Christmas _Tree_?"

"An evergreen tree decorated with ornaments and lights at Christmas time. Here in America the idea of the Christmas tree was _non_-existent until the 1840s." explained Tran "You can usually get them at Christmas tree farm." He finished mater a factly

"Will you stop doing that?!" barked Sunstreaker at 'Tran who just grinned like a cat and gave a replied was making his voice sound like a little kids "Sowy" that got a laugh out of most of them

"Okay we get that part of the picture but what about of the gift thing?" pointed out Windcharger

"Them you have to get for someone, and rap up in raping paper" explained Rachel

"Duh" commented Spike smartly

Rachel glared some more "Your pushing it bub" she growled

"Afterwards you put it under the tree until Christmas day when we'll exchange then."

"If I understand correctly the trick is to keep it a secret until the day comes?" asked Optimus speaking up for the first time as he looked over at Blair for her to tell him he'd said right

Nodding "Right" Blair got to her feet and went serious as she started to address all the waiting 'bot that had her attention "I known it seems _weird_ to you guys but don't worry it will be worth your while in the end. Just remember the gifts you'll be getting for a person or 'bot, has to remain a secret. And don't worry about getting permission from Optimus, I've already taken care of that." Continuing

Some of the 'bots turned to look at their leader who only waved his blue fingers innocently his blue optics filled with mirth. Teletran who had pushed himself closer to the table to listen to the humans chuckled.

"That's all I wanted to say."

Optimus Prime nodded and pushed himself up onto his thick legs standing "Well I believe we've covered the jist of it." he began "If you do have more questions I'm sure one of our friends" inclining his head to the humans "would be please to help with any questions you have."

For the first time in a while the Autobot leader sounded truly please about this all. He himself was completely all for this thing Rachel had 'thrust' upon them, naturally he'd never admit it openly. It had him perplexed and he didn't dought that he'd be one of those mechs that would go to one of the humans for information. That was the old archivist in him he supposed.

Blair smiled up at the Autobot leader then turned to try to find a certain Lancia within the mass of Transformers. He wanted to see he about this holiday and for her to explain more in depth, she had promised after all.

---

A/N:

In this chapter I started to include the whole religion(s) behind Christmas but decided against it. We all have are different opinions about it, some people don't celebrate it. But because I couldn't type what I wanted to include (brain to words thing) I didn't. So I'm leaving it out. Don't flame me about it, that and I'm still deciding weather I believe in it all (God), I don't really concider myself religious but I'm still young, so when it comes to being young you don't understand the world quit yet. (do we ever understand everything around us?)

Sorry babbling again. Hope you enjoyed.

Transformers and all related char(s) belong to HasTak and associated companies

Except Blair, Rachel, and the plot, which are mine


	3. Chapter 3

---

"Jazz watch out!" yelled Bumblebee but the Porsche didn't have time to react

For the past hour several Autobot's, some of them were very unlikely candidates to help in all this, were been helping in decorating the lounge of the _Ark_. Prowl, being his wet blanket self, had only allowed a few of the _Arks_ rooms to be adorned with the colorful items. He'd said it was for security reasons and just in case the Deceptions tried anything 'funny' and they need to scramble fast. Each would take turns going out to look for presents or go out when they weren't called for duty.

Sometimes successful, sometimes not.

So far the 'cons had been lying low, there were a few isolated incidents here and there but nothing that could be tracked back to the Deceptions. If they continued the Autobot's just might have a peacefully adopted holiday to celebrate. Jazz who had been front and center with it all had taken, naturally, to the idea, eager to participate. It was something fun and new, that and something to maybe even help moral around the _Ark _for once. Even some of the mini-bots seemed less, complaining-ish, well minus Bumblebee, he'd been right beside the Porsche.

The sound of shattering glass seemed to echo, in the non-echoing lounge. Jazz stood there somewhat bent over hands still in a large box at his feet. Momentarily stunned the black and white 'bot's visor flickered as he 'blinked'. He, along with several other Autobot's who were watching, watched as small red and silver shards of thin glass tumbled off the saboteurs head an into the box he was still bent over.

Bumblebee had a look on his face like he'd just accidentally ran over at dog "I'm sorry Jazz."

Straightening up his full height Jazz gave his head a shake letting the last few pieces of glass fall off of him.

"You alright Jazz?" asked Blair who came her friends aid

She'd been helping sorting out things, telling what some items were, where'd they go, what they did, the whole shebang. Her sister was somewhere off in another section of the massive ship helping out there. She'd be in one place one minute and in another the next.

Jazz raised his arm and plucked a piece of glass of his chest "Yeah 'm good, don't t'nk any of the pieces did any harm."

The Porsche knelled down and started helping Blair clean up the pieces that had landed on the floor "Don't worry 'bout the box, I'll get 'em. Don't want ya cuttin' ya hands Blair." Placing some of the pieces in an empty ornament box

Bumblebee who'd been making his way down a small ladder like device turned to the Porsche "Sorry Jazz it slipped"

Jazz just gave the mini-bot a good natured smile while he stood back up with a impossibly large amount of garland in his hands "Don't worry 'bout it 'Bee, no harm done."

Despite the saboteurs reinsurance 'Bee still felt kind of bad but didn't pry or bother the 'bot further, they both had a 'job' to do after all. Going back to putting the decorations on the tree that was only semi finished. In the beginning they wanted to go the traditional way and get a real tree but Trailbreaker and Hound wouldn't have none of it.

Luckily 'Tran had stepped in a played negotiator. He was a 'bot of many talents after all. So in the end they _somehow_ gotten the Dinobot's (the willing ones anyway), Ironhide, and Brawn outside to look for a tree, with Trailbreaker and Hound of course making sure that the tree wouldn't be harmed in the process.

It was an 'entertaining' task all its own to say the least.

For some of the Autobot's they were slightly surprised when Optimus Prime had stopped by, making rounds surveying all the work that was being done. He was impressed. Unfortunately he couldn't stay long because an Autobot leaders work was never done. He'd promised to put in some help soon as he got away from his mounds of reports to finish.

Now that he _had _escaped it all Optimus walk into the lounge and noticed the tree was only half way done but almost complete than not done. His presence didn't go unnoticed by a certain young women.

"Optimus! Just to ma—mech I was looking for!" called Blair. Hey she was still slightly new to this all still.

Optimus was some what sheepish all of a sudden "Um, hey Blair. What can I do for you?" looking down at the young women who had garland nearly covering her whole body courteous of a certain Porsche.

He had come to realize when Blair did start opening up about things not as quiet too, her sisters hyper-ness would have a knack for rubbing off on her older sister. Like right now, she was really getting into this.

"Bumblebee and Jazz are almost finished putting up the ornaments on the tree!" she declared attempting to pull off some of the garland but it just looked she was succeeding in getting it more tangled around herself "I want you to put the final one on though."

He knew what she was referring to. Since somehow some of the 'bots has found out about the what different treetop items were used in the long time ritual, it was inevitable a slight argument broke out. Rachel had ended that with an anonymous poll. The Star had won by a landslide. Luckily for Blair she preferred the star over the others.

"I'm honored but . . . why me Blair?" he questioned knelling down beside her to help attempted to rescue her from the garland that seemed like she tasted good

"Well you've been busy and haven't been able to help a lot around here, we don't fault you for it, so we'd figured we let you do the honors of putting the last, some consider most important, ornament of the tree." Referring to the few 'bots in the room who had stopped their duties to watch and listen

The two Autobot's who'd been in charge of getting the star was up to Sideswipe and Bluestreak. Unfortunately they couldn't find one big enough to be considered Transformer sized. So with the help of a certain engineer that goes by Wheeljack the little star grew a few glass limbs and was big enough to fit in the palm of an Autobot.

"Is that true?" Optimus asked turning to the other 'bot's in the room

They all nodded smiles on there faceplates. "Ya bet cha Op'." grinned Jazz like a Cheshire cat "Yeah go ahead Optimus" added Bumblebee who'd at some point gotten off his ladder and was standing off to the side with the biggest grin on his face

Turning back to the star and tree "Okay I guess I can do that." Making Blair's grinned widen

Turning to look at the yellow VW "'Bee you got the star?" she asked

"Sure do." He exclaimed turning to a box that was seating at his feet. They watched the yellow mini-bot pulled up a crystal clear with a slightly blue-tented glass star. "Here you go Optimus."

Gently handing the Autobot leader the precious item. Prime doubled tacked and noticed engraved with utmost precision in it center was the Autobot emblem proudly. Giving a smile behind his mask. Turning back to the tree in front of him with the utmost car he leaned forward raising his arms up he placed the star were it belonged.

"Awesome!" cheered Jazz turning on his own version of several Christmas songs mixed to together in a perfect balance

---

A/N:

Not the longest or funniest thing in the world that and I'm not to satisfied with it.

Hope you enjoyed all the same please leave a review.

Transformers and all related char(s) belong to HasTak and associated companies

Except Blair, Rachel, and the plot, which are mine


	4. Chapter 4

---

"Do you really think that you can get _every one_ of the Autobot's a present, Rachel?"

The scenery outside was just a blurry cold haze as they drove down the road. The leaves on all the trees outside were gold, red, and brown as the two young women looked out the window on their side of the truck. The two had been picked up a few minutes ago from Skylair's place by the rust red (almost the same red as the leaves) Land Rover, Stormer.

"Well I can and I will Skylair" crossing her arms over her chest

Giving her head a shake Skylair looked back out the front window past the stirring wheel and past the hood of the truck, "If you say so" shrugging

"Besides I have connections." She stated bluntly grinning

Skylair looked back at the girl over the rim of her glasses with a raised brow "I'm sure you do" she finally stated

"I do!"

If she had been in her root mood Stormer would have just rolled her optics at the silver haired girls stubbornness. She herself didn't see how Rachel was going to be able to by _all_ the 'bots at the _Ark_ gifts either, but she wouldn't risk commenting on that. Then again Rachel did have a nice income on working on vehicles along with a side job in town. Still if Stormer added it all up in her head it well . . . didn't add up.

Considering there were almost 30 'bots back at the _Ark_ that's not including Rachel's human friends and family.

Easing out of the tension "_So Skylair_" she began _"What are you going to get Chip?" _she asked

Skylair pushed her glasses closer up her nose looking over at the dashboard "Well really I'm not exactly sure, I'm working on it though." She reassured

Chuckling _"Better get the show on the road there's only a few more day's before Christmas."_

Skylair frowned a slight anxious look appearing on her face "Yeah . . .I know" putting her hands on the stirring wheel

---

The Portland mall wasn't the biggest mall by no means but it was almost as big as Salem's. As predicted the mall was buzzing with shoppers heading in and out of all kinds of stores. Families chatted away laughing while they went, couples shared their kisses, parents chased their kids down, and little kids waited their turn to sit on Santa's lap and getting their pictures taken.

The mall itself was decorated to the brim for the holiday with colorful decorations of all shapes and sizes. Ducking once again as to not walk into some lights that hung down from the mall ceiling the rust red Stormer naturally turned heads. The Transformers were still a new thing around here but at least no one panicked any more. That got embarrassing after a while.

Her three human accomplishes tried to ignore the occasional stares and chatter but Stormer was to transfixed on everything else to really notice it. Rachel stopped and looked up at the Autobot femme. It always amused her how easily the femme could be 'entertained', for the lack of words, with the simple every day thing that _humans _provided.

"Alright Stormer your with me!" she called up at the rust red naturalist

The tall femme looked down at Rachel for a moment as if not fully possessing what she had said "Hu? Oh yeah, alright!"

Rachel turned back to her sister and friend "Blair, Skylair we'll meet you back here in a hour."

Giving her sister a nod "Right see you then."

Younger sister and naturalist took to the left end of the mall older sister and scientist took the right end. To say the least the mall was crowded Skylair didn't mind really she was us to it by now. Going to banquets, conventions, and the like over the years for some new invention, a fellow scientist achievement, or unveiling since she was young, a teen really, she had come accustom to crowds.

Blair on the other hand, even though she appeared not to mind right now, she didn't care too much for them. But she had to be here and she actually didn't mind being here she liked this kind of public setting but it wouldn't last long. She hated family reunions, family parties, and such for Pete's sake!

Realizing she was being left Skylair jogged up beside Blair who was already heading to her fist designation "Where we heading to first?" she asked turning as she walked to avoid a mom and her kid

Blair pulled a strand of hair back behind her ear before looking over at he friend a faint smile on her face. "Mass production began in 1964 in Hanover, Germany." She began.

Skylair raised a brow of slight confusion. It wasn't that she didn't understand what Blair was talking about; she did, but odd time to bring it up. She'd learned from almost the get go that Blair had a knack for stating . . . odd facts at the most oddest and random of times. Like right now.

"The Mercury Record Company, a U.S. affiliate of Philips, introduced the M.C's to the U.S. in September 1966." She finished

Looking at the young women for a moment she knew Blair wasn't a vain type of person or prideful, to an extent anyway, but her voice didn't hold either of the two. It sounded far away like she was concentrating on something or was thinking deeply about what ever it was.

Turning her head slightly to look over at Skylair for a moment before asking: "know what it is?" she asked

"M.C. Musicassettes. What is this a game show?"

Letting out a laugh Blair put her hands in her pockets not saying anything about that "Bingo!" she exclaimed heading into her store of pick

Skylair fallowed the mechanic inside the store, which was a popular music store around here.

"Jazz I presume" answering her own question

Blair took off toward the left of the store kind of leaving Skylair to defend for her self luckily she staid not to far behind "I'm hopping they have that new Journey[1 cassette I want to get for Jazz." Heading down another isle "There's also an orchestra one I think he'd enjoy," her voice just above a whisper as she quickly scanned the rows and rows of the little plastic objects

The shop was obviously felled with a few records and cassettes. Being a music store that sold tracks with bands they had movies, posters, and other merchandise and naturally loads of people. Skylair was glad she dressed in casual dress for once because she felt somewhat out of place in here. She just did for some reason.

"That's all?"

Picking up a plastic cassette "No way! I still have Optimus, Prowl and a few of the other guys to buy for." Putting the cassette back into his spot and continuing on "You?"

"I still have a lot to buy." Picking up a record and examined it for a moment before continuing on "Truthfully I've never been much of a holiday person, but still I feel bad because I don't know the Autobot's as well as you, Rachel, Spike and his dad do." Her words honest

Truthfully she'd only met the Autobot's for about three months when Chip mentioned something about her to them and that just so happened she was a genius. It wasn't vanity it was the truth. When she was suppose to be just starting Junior High she was in College. She'd instantly taken to Wheeljack because just as lady luck had it she herself had a knack for blowing things up to, to the _Arks _dismay. Surprisingly though after her arrival the anonymous sudden shuttering from the _Ark _decreased.

Poor Ratchet had become anxiety and paranoid stricken for about the first two months afraid Wheeljack would end up killing her. So far the only serious incident, which wasn't really serious, was when they flipped on a switch to a project they'd been working on and it ended up backfiring filling the lab with pink and green smoke, covering both of them in the two colors, Wheeljack 'fins' included and Skylair's, hair was died pink with light green streaks.

Blair turned and smiled as she found the cassette she was looking for "Don't worry about it. They'll understand. If it makes you feel better I haven't know them much longer than you, a few months yeah but you not alone."

That helped Skylair a little bit. She looked up letting Blair leave her to continue looking for another cassette. The place was huge but she wasn't a music person either she'd prefer to go lock herself in a lab. Since she'd know the two sisters she'd admit it wasn't to bad coming out and going to the mall. Now that she remembered one track she'd remembered listening to a while back.

---

Carrying several large plastic bags in bother arms Rachel and Stormer both stepped out of the toy store they'd just been in shopping. Stormer was caring a large bag under her arm and appeared to be having a little trouble with it, nearly dropping it once or twice.

"I can't believe they even make stuffed animals this big!" she exclaimed walking beside Rachel

"Your telling me" nearly dropping her bags

The walked over to a bench to let Rachel deposit her stuff for a second to see how much money she still had left. Quickly grabbing the impossibly large bag she was carrying Stormer threw it over her shoulder holding on to it by its handles.

"I'm glad that guy decided to come early to get his car painted and added leather seats." Putting her wallet away and looking up at Stormer with a grin on her face

"Why's that? Got more shopping to do?" the grin told her all she needed to know right at the get go. "Yep!" Smiling and giving her head a shake Stormer looked between what was in the bag and the young women and back again.

"I know this is obvious but is this who I think it's for?" she finally asked

Rachel's grin grew bigger as she took her arms out of one of the bags. Stormer raised an optic ridge "Oh dear" Rachel laughed and Stormer sighed as she looked down the mall and at the sea of people. "Where we going now?"

Grunting and cursing under her breath Rachel proceeded to pick up the bags back up and start checking names of her fingers. "Gotta get somethin' for Cliff', Prowler, the Jazz-man, Huffer, two more of the Dinobot's, and like three others Autobot's" looking back up at Stormer "But I forget who it was" grinning sheepishly

Once again the rust red Land Rover found herself sighing, "Okay then, lets go. I still got to get something for my brother."

The two took off on their business just having a good time in the process. You couldn't beet going to the mall with a good friend and buying stuff for other good friends. The mall atmosphere was just fun adding to the mood the two girls, even if one was a fifteen-foot tall robot, mood.

---

_Journey: __After an unsuccessful radio contest to name the group Roadie(?)_ _Jack Villanueva suggested the name in 1971 __the American rock band formed in 1973 in San __Francisco, California. Height of_ _popularity in 1981-1983._ (_source Wikipedia)_

A/N:

I don't remember but I think this is Skylair's first appearance in any of my stories but she's one of my OC's as is Stormer. Oh and Stormer's brother is Trailbreaker just to clear any questions. I'll get to both of their stories and when they showed up later. Promise. Got to finish up all my other stuff first.

Hope you enjoyed, as always please leave a review and thanks for all my peeps that have. Most appreciated.

Transformers and all related char(s) belong to HasTak and associated co.

Except for Blair, Rachel, Skylair, Stormer, and the plot, which are mine.


	5. Chapter 5

---

Slowly, actually it just felt slowly, but everything was coming into place with flying colors or should I say tinsel, colored lights, and rapping paper. Several days had past now since Rachel, Blair, Skylair, and Stormer's, raided of the local mall and several other stores along the way. Blair and Skylair had yet to pry out of the other two what was in the impassably large bag Stormer had thrown over her shoulder.

Neither of the budged on telling what it was.

Christmas was just right around the corner more than it was a few days ago the anticipation at the _Ark _was almost unbearable for the more eager mechs of the massive ship. Naturally the one who'd you'd never think would really care much for all this secretly were just as thrilled.

"Wait up Rachel!"

"I am!"

Bumblebee strolled up behind the waiting girl looking over the edge of the large decorated box he was_ trying_ to hold onto. The thing was huge . . .well not to Bumblebee the box was to Rachel though, but it came close. This particular box was decorated in shinny dole read and yellow foil rapping paper with a lopsided silver bow on its top. Scattered on the box was little pictures of ornaments and . . . hats?

"Rachel what's inside of this thing?" referring to the box

"None ya" came the quick reply

"Aww come on I'm the one toting this thing around!"

Rachel just continued on her way walking caring her own sacks of things she had bought at the mall with the others and carefully rapped and/or put in bags with tissue paper. Reaching inside one her bags that was on her right arm, and seemed different from the others, she pulled out a small box while letting the other bags hang from the crock oh her inner elbows.

"Sorry 'Bee I can't tell, well at least not yet"

"Wait" he began watching her as he walked up beside he as she started opening the red box "Does it have to do with this _thing_ you've got going here is it?"

She grinned but whether it was what she pulled out of the box or at him he wasn't sure.

"Yep!" giving her common answer

Watching with curiosity at what she was pulling out of the bag Bumblebee watched as she pulled out a little red rectangle box with a plastic top, opened the it more shifting some of the bags on her left arm Rachel pulled a . . .

"Is that a cookie?"

Looking up at the yellow bug with a large than life grin on her face "Shhh don't tell" still grinning like a mad person until she took a large bit out of the large round cookie devouring nearly half of it. The poor thing didn't stand a chance against Rachel.

Giving his head a shake "So whose this thing for anyway?" asked Bumblebee shifting the box into a better position in his arms

"On' of 'he 'ino . . .'ot's" she mumbled munching on the cookie

Stopping abruptly right in the middle of the hallway, box still in tow he had turned sideways to be able to look at Rachel as she continued on her way not noticing he had stopped. He was really hopping that his translation of her 'mumbled' words were wrong.

"What?!" jogging back up to her side

Swallowing the rest of the cookie she still had in her mouth she looked at the rest of the warm chocolate chip cookie. She appeared more transfixed on the cookie than the yellow bug that was still trying to process what she had said. Or maybe Rachel was being Rachel and was toying with him. Wouldn't be the first time she messed around with one of the Autobot's.

Looking up at Bumblebee psycho smile on her face "You heard me"

"Well" he paused rethinking what he was going to say "Okay whatever but . . ." looking at the box again "What could you possibly find that one them would want?"

She'd had by now looked back down at the half eaten cookie. Just as she was going to take another bit, "Not tellin'." _Munch_

'Bee sagged his shoulders "Aww come on I want to _know_! I wont tell! I promise!" he whined

"I know" swallowing "But if I told you that it wouldn't be a secret now would it?"

Quiet descended on in the hall for a few moments as Bumblebee thought it over, she did have a point there. Darn.

"Fine" he huffed "so gotten me anything yet?" grinning as he started following her again

Popping the last of the chocolate chip cookie in her mouth ginning still like a mad person as her cheeks plotted out as she chewed she looked up at Bumblebee for a moment "Nope sorry 'Bee/"

The yellow 'bot's lower jaw dropped with a clang on the floor "WHAT?!? Why not?! I've been a good mini-bot this year!" he whined

Glad she had swallowed the last of the cookie because she busted out laughing right then and there. Jumping into a run she sprinted down the hall laughing like a manic on crack.

"Rachel get back here!!" taking off at a run be nearly tripped over his own feet luckily he caught himself

---

A/N:

I've realized this story isn't all too funny but unfortunately when I comes to humor for me it has to be spur of the moment. I can't just think it up. I usually forget jokes that I'm trying to tell anyway. But hey I'm trying. If you can decipher what Rachel said you get one of her cookies –grin-

Thanks for the kind reviews on last chapter. Most appreciated. Hope you enjoyed please leave me another.

Transformers and all related char(s) belong to HasTak and associated companies

Except Blair, Rachel, Stormer, Skylair, and the plot, which are mine


	6. Chapter 6

---

The room was only practically lit mostly for the light decorations that were strung everywhere in the lounge. Jazz's music flowed through the background adding to the mood for the occasion, that and the Porsche was rather pleased with his handy work to.

It was something new to him and trying his musical skills with Earth music sounded, fun, which it had been.

Speaking of the Porsche, Jazz was seated between Bluestreak who was turned around in his seat watching Cliffjumper, who was seating on the floor on the other side of the couch, opening a present. Knees in the couch's crease only his nose and round childish optics, not mentioning small red chevron, peaking over the couch side as he watched.

Cliffjumper himself had been rather surprised that someone had thought of him let alone taken up the time to get him something. Taking the gift without question, he had nothing to say words had failed him, he found the next valuable spot to, which was where he sat now. The red voltswagon had sat there for a long while before Jazz had leaned over and, whispered, "_your suppose ta open t' Cliff''_.

Cliffjumper frowned but held back his comment. Doing as he was _instructed_ he'd opened it. So now seating loosely in his hands like Author who'd just been given _Excalibur_ he stared at the hand held pistol pondering on what he had done to be given this. He'd never admit it out loud, and only to himself now but he wasn't the type of mech who'd someone get a gift for. End of story.

A small figure walking up to his left finally drew the red 'bot out of his silent musing. Standing there near his foot was Blair a light smile on her face.

"Like it?" she asked

Snapping his mouth shut from where he had been ajar rudely Cliffjumper looked back down at the black pistol with maroon accents with an odd look. He could say anything and when he did think of something to say he didn't want to say it afraid of offending. That was a first. So he stuck with the simplest of aknowledgement; a nod.

"Rachel and Wheeljack made it, or more or less 'Jack did." Blair grinned slipping her hand behind her and into her back jean pockets. "Don't worry though it won't backfire or anything when I found out they were making it for you I got Ironhide to test it out."

She made sure to add that bit of information when she saw Cliffjumper snap his gaze up at her with a face mixed with confusion and concern.

Chuckling she continued, "Ironhide approved."

Looking back down at the pistol "I don't know what to say"

Bluestreak lifted his head up slightly and replied "Thank you"

Cliffjumper looked up at the Datsun who grinned back down at him with that huge grin of his and there was a faint sound of Jazz like chuckle from over the edge of the couch. _Interloper_. Just when he was about to speak in reply, maybe, he was cut off from a sudden loud commotion from somewhere else in the room.

"Careful Bumblebee!"

"I am, geez!"

Bluestreak sat up looking over his shoulder accross the room. Attempting to to pick a box that seemed to be almost as big as he was Bumblebee. Rachel stood slightly off not wanting to get stepped on by the bug by accident. Without warning Bumblebee made a _eek_ noise as he suddenly had no weight on his arms and nearly feel over balance thrown off suddenly. Flickering his optics he looked up to were Ironhide was standing with the large box under one arm studying it for a second before looking back down at the yellow VW with a smirk on his aged faceplate.

Frowning "I could have gotten it" 'Bee muttered

Chuckling the Ironhide turned to Rachel "Whose it to?"

"Grimlock"

Ironhide stopped for a second and sputtered for a moment as he stared down at the human before him who was looking up at him like she always did. Big smile, bright green eyes, innocent, if you will. Choosing not to comment knowing that the girl was strange behind all the things she did let alone how she found something for the T-rex anyway he just nodded with a raised an optics ridge.

"Okay, Grimlock it is" shrugging and turning on his heel heading to the 'rex

Already knowing who the gift was for it wasn't as strange to Bumblebee than it was before still kinda odd though. Just as he was about to start following Rachel someone called out his name and he stopped and turn his head to were he'd heard the voice. Hound!

Rachel jogged behind the red Autobot as he took the gift over to the Dinobot who was looking at something that he'd been given. Spike was standing their in front of the large Dino so it must had been from him. From what Rachel could tell it was three record's which were more or less the same thing as books even though they looked like mechanical tombstones.

They had a single spot on the front that looked like a glass sphere embeded in it. When you opened it, it opened on hinges. Here was were every record was different. You could open one and it have almost paper thin, but sterdy, glass plates usually green or blue in color, that turned over like pages in a book. Others were just like regular data or digi pads. That and most records now were just human stories scanned and put inside one since, well little book were just to small for Transformer fingers.

Thank Wheeljack, like usual, the 'bot must have a lot of time on his hands.

That aside Grimlock had three, two were gray in color the other had a blue hue to it.

"Hey Grim' got cha anoth'a!" called Ironhide getting the Dino's attention away from the three records.

Rachel stopped right beside the red war vet smile never leaving her face as Ironhide answered something that the Dinobot had said. A shadow falling over her brought Rachel out of thoughts an attention. Raising her head to look up Rachel smiled up realizing who it was.

"Is that the thing you bought for him when we went to the mall?" Stormer questioned

"Yep!" Rachel chirped up at the rust red femme

Chuckling Stormer stepped around the young women she'd grown to like in the short time she'd been present at the _Ark_ and took a seat beside the large Dinobot who was looking over his present with the utmost curiosity. Seating to her right was Sludge who she quickly greeted with a kindly 'hello' which was retured. She'd noticed something tucked under Sludges arm but decided not to bug so she just turned back to watch Grimlock with a smile on her face.

Realizing the present had yet even come close to being opened Stormer leanded over and whispered in the Dinobot's audio _"You suppose to open it now Grim'."_ slight humor in her voice

Blue visor flickering Grimlock glanced over at the femme only to turn away to stare at the largest gift yet that just so happened to be his. Rumor had it the T-rex had a thing for the Land Rover but no one had dared to ask. What had lead up to that was another story for another time but there had been a lot of stuttering involved, not mentioning odd looks when the Dinobot leader turned tail and ran. Some of the Autobot's figured it was just that the Grimlock, and the other Dinobot's, just had never seen a female Transformer before being as they'd never been to Cybertron.

Like I stated no one dared ask the two 'bots that had already had been sent to Ratchet about it no sense pushing it.

Giving a snort in response even though he was thankful for his mask because he could feel his faceplate underneath heating up Grimlock started undoing the package. Ironhide stepped back, curiousity getting he better of him, he leaned back on the edge of a couch, arms crossed over his chest watching, waiting to see what was inside. The grin on Stormer and Rachel's faceplate never left.

Seating on the other couch not to far from Ironhide, Jazz looked over at Blair who wasn't seating to far lolly-pop in her mouth who was also watching Grimlock opening the present from Rachel. Optimus, who was seating quietly looking through a record he'd reaceved from Blair, looked over his shoulder and raised an optic ridge.

"What did she get him?" he questioned

Blair just shrugged poping the lolly-pop out from between her gums "I don't know only her and Stormer do."

"Holy slag" gasped Jazz

Blair and Optimus snapped their attention over to the Porsche with the impossably large Santa hat on his black helm, realizing what was behind the comment they looked back over in the direction of Grimlock. By now a few of the othe Autobot's attention had been grapped and were now gapping at what Grimlock had pulled out of the box.

Rachel chuckled sheepishly "I'm sorry if you don't like it Grim' you were hard to buy for." she shrugged "It's the thought that counts after all, right."

Seating in the Dinobot's hand was a giant stuff cartoonish looking dole green T-rex that looked like he was smiling up at the Dinobot leader, teeth and all. Grimlock leaned down to place the now empty box on the floor ignoring or not noticing the looks he was getting . . . the stuffted T-rex was getting.

Seating still beside him Stormer chuckled "I think its kinda cute and I'm not the kinda fem-bot who digs cute."

Grimlock glanced quickly over at Stormer before looking down to find Rachel still grinning up at him waiting for some sort of comment.

"Me Grimlock say thanks to you Rachel. Me Grimlock like." he finally replied large grin behind his mask

Laughing Rachel throw up her arm into the air "Great!"

---

A/N:

I'm so sorry for the delay dreaded writers block hit me like a ton of bricks at the wrong time. When I did finish it (somewhat) I couldn't figure out how to end it or more or less the ending didn't come to me. So what ya read is what you and I get. Now all I got to do is figure out how to finish it which I have no idea how. Stay patient I hate waiting to. (sigh) So sorry for the pathertic ending but atleast you know what Rachel got Grim' now.

Thanks loads for the kind reviews previously, they keep me going. Please review on this one to!

Transformers and all related char(s) belong to HasTak and associated companies

Except Blair, Rachel, Stormer, Skylair, and the plot, which are mine


	7. Chapter 7

000

It was mostly quiet except for conversation and the sound of random items going off. Jazz still had the music going at a soft level in the background. Things had started to calm down signaling that the part was coming to a close but still most everyone was still present and would be for a while yet. They just wanted to enjoy the atmosphere a while longer, the presence of everyone, friends, family, possibly more.

"I bet you can't fit two of those in your mouth at once."

Seating on the couch with a box of cookies she was sharing with the others who could consume them Rachel narrowed her eyes up at Sideswipe. The red twin had that mischievous smirk on his faceplate. A challenge huh?

Spike who was seating beside Rachel looked down at the chocolate cooking he was holding. The brown treat was almost as big as his hand! Turning back Spike gave Rachel a look that said 'your kidding right' but he knew it was pointless to saying anything just by seeing that look on Rachel's face.

"Bet'cha I can." countered Rachel

"Bet'cha you can't!" he mocked

Smirking Rachel took another hand-sized cookie out of the box and placed it on her knee. Taking the one she had already bitten on once and bluntly broke it in half putting it in her mouth in between her lips and holding it there. Taking the other cookie she repeated the action of breaking it in half and placing it in her mouth.

Smiling some how even with a mouth full of cookie Rachel turned to Sideswipe grinning. Seating still beside her haven watched the whole thing Spike busted out in a laughing fit.

"That's not fair." Grumbled Sideswipe optics narrowed at Rachel

Taking the cookies out of her mouth so she didn't chock, "Is too!"

Laughter erupted in the room as Rachel finished off her cookies from the 'bots who'd watched the whole exchange. Unlike her sister who only eats sugar related goodies on rare occasions but to Rachel she greatly abused top section of the food pyramid whenever she got the chance. And at this time of year Rachel loved her cookies, the simple traditional kind.

000

From where she was seating talking casually with a small group of the Autobot's seating on the table by Optimus and Prowl, something caught her eyes. Double taking she looked over to where a certain Porsche and Datsun where talking, well, more accurately, whispering to each other mischievous grins on their faceplates. Jazz was seating back on the couch looking at Smokescreen whom was leaned over the back of the couch, arms crossed over the backrest. Blair knew just by the way their were acting, the grins, and Jazz himself, the two where plotting.

Watching from the courier of her light brown eyes, she watched as Bumblebee, who was seating to Jazz's left suddenly got in on the conversation. And after a few moments he was grinning too.

'_This can't be good.'_

Smokescreen leaning back and taking a sip of his small cube of high-grade and a loud laugh between the trio was the beginning of the end of whatever conversation they had. Frowning for a moment, Blair just rolled her eyes before turning back to the mech's at the table, picking up where she had left off. For some reason though she felt the need to look back over toward the couch then around the room.

The blue Datsun was nowhere to be found from what she could see an she sighed again.

"Hey, Skylair! Chip! Look up!"

Needless to say that was enough to get the whole rooms attention as Jazz, leaning back quite casually from his place on the couch, high-grade cube in one hand. Smug almost. The two humans, who he called out, where seating across from the Porsche exchanged curious looks between each other and inevitably _looked up_.

Gazing down at them was a pair of mischievous light blue optics glowing against a pale gray faceplate with a medium sized bright yellow chevron adoring his helm. What stood out most was the large audio-to-audio grin plastered on the mech's faceplate. Smokescreen was leaning one forearm lying across the backrest of the couch and held up in one blue hand was something the two humans weren't to please to see.

Between two blue digits was a plastic replica of a plant dangling like a bell; mistletoe.

Skylair scowled deeply at the blue and maroon Datsun as it registered with her what was going on. Lowering her head she scowled over at Jazz, still grinning like a chestier cat at her, behind her small glasses.

"You're insane." Despite it all her cheeks where long since pink

Beside her seating in his wheelchair, Chip couldn't help but blush either, albeit a lot more fiercely.

That was enough to make Jazz smile even more. "It's self diagnosed, yes. Though I'm sure Ratchet would concur, but 'at's not the topic of discussion." He said in an accent for the moment. "Now c'mon Skylair," he chortled standing "Ya know the tradition. It would be bad luck if ya chickened out not mentioning it might hurt Chip's feelin's."

Said young man jumped glasses sliding down his nose and just when he was about to speak Skylair cut him off.

"Since when?!"

Putting a black hand on his chest plate and answering in a matterafact tone, "Since now."

Still leaning over the back of the couch Smokescreen, who had been keeping quiet for the moment decided to speak up. "What are you chicken Skylair. I don't think Chip would mind a kiss from a pretty lady like you." He only received a glare

"True there." Jazz stated

Glancing down at Chip from the corner of her eye who was looking over at Jazz Skylair turned back around arms crossed over her chest for a moment and huffed. Then, Skylair uttering quietly a 'fine' that only Smokescreen caught, without warning catching Chip Chase off guard he suddenly had face centimeters from him and a pair of warm lips on his. He had gasped (though not remembering doing so) thus succeeding in getting an open mouth kiss.

Throw out the room whistles, cheers, good-natured laughs filled the room as Chip's cheeks continued to heat up, glasses sliding down his nose. Even though it seemed a lot longer to the young man, it was only a few fleeting moments before Skylair straightened back up, arms crossed over her chest, embarrassed. She probably wouldn't be admitting it anytime soon, but she felt satisfied with her self with what she had done, like a weight off her shoulders.

Giving a laugh Bumblebee jumped up standing up on the couch slinging his arm around Jazz's shoulder an whispered something to the Porsche. Sharing a loud laugh the two held up their high-grade cubes turning toward Skylair, Chip, and Smokescreen who had given the mistletoe to Skylair. The occupants of the room where still watching.

It was quite obvious that the VW, Porsche had a little too much high-grade in their systems. "Primus bless, us everyone!" The room bluntly erupted in laughs and cheers.

. . .END. . .

000

A/N:

You can totally blame MyBlueOblivion for the ending, dudes a bad influence, not complaining though. Just messing. Can you believe that it's taken almost two years plus to finish this Primus forsaken thing? That's ridiculous. But I promised myself I'd finish this…_eventually_. Totally wanted to add at least one more section but unfortunately after I finished writing the mistletoe scene I got nothing, so I decided this one would end it. If anyone's interested I created a artblog to post up some stuff. PM me if your interested, and well figure things out after that.

Thanks all you lovely people for the reviews, they mean loads to me!

TF's and all related char(s) belong to Has/Tak an associated co.

Except for Blair, Rachel, Skylair, and the plot, which is mine.

Names and/of characters are entirely coincidental


End file.
